Sunday, July 27, 2008

In My Brokenness

Right outside our front door is a flower pot.  When we first were given this pot it was clean and very pretty.  As it sits outside in all kinds of weather it has become dirty. Not only is it dirty, but I have noticed a huge crack on one side.  It doesn't look new any more.   I have been so tempted to throw it away or at least put it out in the recycle bin.  But as I thought more about this pot, I realize that God is using it to teach me to trust Him more. For I, too, am a vessel, dirty and cracked!  As I am journeying down this difficult path, I am becoming painfully more and more aware of how imperfect I truly am. God knows all of my sins and my imperfections.  He is showing me ones that have been so deep within me that they have been hard to acknowledge, as they have been brought to the surface.  Yet God in His mercy and grace is still using me, in spite of my brokenness.  He is walking with me on my journey reminding me of His love and forgiveness.  He is drawing me closer to Himself, and teaching me to trust Him fully. I so desperately  and passionately want this type of relationship with God. He is using my brokenness to shape me, to sharpen me, to mold me and to help me trust Him.  I need to know He can use me.
   When I feel useless and unworthy  and I don't know where God wants me or what He wants me to do, all I have to do is peek out my window and look at my not so perfect flower pot sitting on my front porch! It is still home to my Mother's Day plant, with a purpose all of it's own.  I have also seen a chipmunk  digging around in the dirt inside the pot. This is just another way God is choosing to use this broken and cracked flower pot. I could move the plant to another pot and it would probably live there equally as well. I am sure the little  chipmunk could find more dirt to frolic in, if I got rid of the pot. Yet, I am keeping it as a reminder to me that God is willing to use me right where I am, as a broken vessel. He sees beyond the cracks in my life.  He loves me regardless of my dirt and shortcomings.  My trust in His plan for my life is growing, and He is using my pot as a reminder that He is not finished with me yet.

Learning to trust God . . . in my brokenness . . . One Day at a Time.

Carla

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